Looking for some clever and funny coffee quotes?! We've got you covered.
We believe that there is a coffee quote for every coffee lover. We put together all the best coffee quotes that we love. Enrich your coffee life with the following clever, beautiful and funny coffee quotes:
Funny Coffee Quotes
1. "May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short."
Anonymous
2. "Today's good mood is sponsored by coffee."
- Anonymous
3. "Caffeine- It maintains my sunny personality."
- Anonymous
4. "Three cups of coffee a day keeps the doctor away!"
– Anonymous
5. "Stressed, blessed, and coffee obsessed."
Anonymous
6. "Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break."
– Earl Wilson
7. "A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems."
– Alfred Renyi
8. "Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his coffee before it was cool."
– Barista Life
9. "Coffee helps me maintain my 'never killed anyone streak.'”
Anonymous
10. "I put coffee in my coffee."
– Anonymous
11. "The most dangerous drinking game is seeing how long I can go without coffee."
– Anonymous
12."I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake."
- Lewis Black
13."If you are not coffee, chocolate or bacon, I’m going to need you to go away."
– Anonymous
14. "When my blood runs black as the moonless night, and my heartbeat sounds as the Warriors march, only then may you say, I’ve had enough coffee."
– Anonymous
15. "I was taken by the power that savoring a simple cup of coffee can have to connect people and create community."
Howard Schultz
16. "You should know that before 10 am, no matter what the question is, my answer is always coffee."
Anonymous
17. "Sometimes I go hours without drinking coffee…it’s called sleeping."
– Anonymous
18. "It’s strange how drinking cups of water seems impossible but 8 cups of coffee go down like a chubby kid on a see-saw."
– Anonymous
19. "Life without coffee is like something without something…sorry, I haven’t had any coffee yet."
– Anonymous
Top Selling coffee makers
20. “Coffee is the best medicine.”
Anonymous
21. “I like my coffee like I like myself: strong, sweet, and too hot for you.”
–Jac Vanek
22. “If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.”
–Abraham Lincoln
23. “Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?”
– Jean Kerr
24. “But even a bad cup of coffee is better than no coffee at all. New York has great water for coffee.”
David Lynch
25. “My coffee machine is the most beautiful person in the world to me.”
— Anonymous
26. “Everyone should believe in something. I believe I will have another coffee.”
— Anonymous
27. “7 days without coffee makes one WEAK.
— Anonymous
28. “Doctors found traces of blood in my coffee stream.”
— Anonymous
29. “Coffee, because adulting is hard.”
– Anonymous
30. “Coffee owns me, and I’m fine with that.”
-Anonymous
31. “You’re brew-tiful.”
– Anonymous
32. “It’s coffee o’clock.”
Anonymous
Clever Coffee Quotes
33. “I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without it.”
— Anonymous
34. “SYS Not Found: User startup disabled.”
— Anonymous
35. “Listen, before I had my coffee, I didn’t know how awesome I was going to be today, either.”
36. “Wanna hear a joke? Decaf.”
– Anonymous
37. “Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s caffeine.”
– Anonymous
38. “Drink coffee and pretend to know what you’re doing.”
– Anonymous
39. “To me, the smell of fresh–made coffee is one of the greatest inventions.”
Hugh Jackman
40. “Coffee, the favorite drink of the civilized world.”
– Thomas Jefferson
41. “Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried–up piece of goat.”
– J.S. Bach
42. “It’s amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee.”
– Donna A. Favors
43. “Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.”
– Alphonse Allais
44. “I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.”
S. Eliot
45. “Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.”
– David Letterman
46. “May your coffee kick in before reality does.”
– Anonymous
47. “Humanity runs on coffee.”
– Anonymous
48. “I judge a restaurant by the bread and by the coffee.”
– Burt Lancaster
49. “I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.”
Steven Wright
50. “Kids are meeting in coffee shops and basements figuring out what’s unsustainable in their communities. That’s the future.”
– Ian Somerhalder
51. “When life gives you lemons, trade them for coffee.”
– Anonymous
52. “No one can understand the truth until he drinks of coffee’s frothy goodness.”
– Sheik Abd-al-Kadir
53. “Once you wake up and smell the coffee, it’s hard to go back to sleep.”
– Fran Drescher
54. “As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?”
Cassandra Clare
55.”You can’t have a decent food culture without a decent coffee culture: the two things grow up together.”
– Adam Gopnik
56. “We want to do a lot of stuff; we’re not in great shape. We didn’t get a good night’s sleep. We’re a little depressed. Coffee solves all these problems in one delightful little cup.”
– Jerry Seinfeld
57. “The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportional to the quantity of coffee he drank.”
– Sir James MacKintosh
58. “Coffeeology: Espresso yourself. So many blends, so little time. Take life one sip at a time, and stay grounded. Better latte than never. Take time to smell the cover.”
– Anonymous
59. “Life happens, coffee helps.”
Anonymous
60. “A bad day with coffee is better than a good day without it.”
– Anonymous
61. “I don’t know how people live without coffee, I really don’t.”
– Martha Quinn
62. “People say money can’t buy happiness. They lie. Money buys coffee, coffee makes me happy!”
– Anonymous
63. “I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee.”
— Terri Guillemets
64. “I like my coffee with cream and my literature with optimism.”
Abigail Reynolds
65. “Adventure in life is good… consistency in Coffee even better.”
— Justina Headley
66. “I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless.”
— Napoleon Bonaparte
67. “The road to success is paved in coffee.”
— Anonymous
68. “There is no life without water. Because water is needed to make coffee.”
— Anonymous
69. “Given enough coffee, I could rule the world.”
Anonymous
70. “I’d rather take coffee than compliments just now.”
― Louisa May Alcott
71. “Coffee is a way of stealing time that should by rights belong to your older self.”
― Terry Pratchett
72. “It doesn’t matter where you’re from – or how you feel… There’s always peace in a strong cup of coffee.”
― Gabriel Bá
73. “Life is too short to drink bad coffee.”
– Anonymous
74. “Some coffee, plus some thinking, equals some great ideas.”
– Anonymous
75. “Without coffee, nothing gets written. Period.”
Nancy Kress
We hope you enjoy these coffee quotes as much as we do!
Share them with your friends during your coffee break, clink your coffee mugs together and let us know what’s your favorite.
Also, don’t forget to check out the coffee collection that keeps us sane!
Leave a comment
This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.